As the faceless alien pushed the sample swab down my throat and into my liver, my gag reflex over-stimulated and I heaved like a cat expelling a hairball. And yes, suggesting the swab went all the way down to my liver is a gross exageration of reality, but ask any gynae patient about real versus perceived medical experiences and you’ll quickly learn that the perception is what counts.

If it feels gross, it is.

I just tolerated my fourth COVID test. I had to have a few before because of my ankle operations. But this was also my last. I don’t care if in the future I cough out a virus the size of a Chevrolet Spark, this is it. And the only reason I went for a fourth bloody test is because I’m scheduled to see people in the next two weeks…

Wouldn’t it be grand if it was just me? Apart from my introverted little heart beating zealously at the idea of ‘just me’, my medical aid would certainly have saved a bit of money and I would not live in constant fear of making other people sick.

My immune system is a beast. Apart from the symptoms I have now, I never get sick. But others do not have an immune system from Kripton and are not as lucky to survive the virus unscathed. My body may take an infection like a champ, but my mind will fail me if I have to live with the idea that I made someone sick.

I live alone and I’ve never been more thankful for that. If I can just get the next two weeks’ meetings behind me I can self-isolate until I can afford my first flying car. But to do that, I had to swallow a swab.

And now…the wait…


  1. As a fellow introvert, I do feel selfish sometimes, and I sometimes wish things were just about me. I realised the extent of my nature when I thrived in lockdowns instead of suffered from them (privileges of not having to lose my job and starve excluded). Wishing you the best with your final test!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I hear you, apart from feeling guilt-ridden about what others have been going through, lockdown have not been difficult to deal with. This topic reminds me a lot of my grandmother, a difficult, difficult woman who fought me to the very end to remain in her little home. She didn’t want to be surrounded by ‘other people’, but wanted to leave this earth in her bed, with her stuff. Most people don’t understand that, but it hit real with me…

      Thanks for the wishes!


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